French writer Gustave Flaubert
(Madame Bovary) died on this day in 1880.
He wrote:
An acquaintance of mine died recently. When I heard, I called
a friend to see if he knew. He said what many people invariably say:
“But I just talked
to him yesterday/last week/last month”(fill in the blank).
George Carlin, who died in 2008 (but it seems like he just
talked to me last week!), used to do a routine on this universal response,
something like this:
“Oh, really? Well, you dumb cluck (epithet sanitized), it didn’t HELP
him any, did it? He STILL died, even
though you TALKED to him. As a matter of
fact, now that I think of it, the very act of your talking to him might even
have HASTENED his demise…”
Pretty funny. But here’s
my take on it:
We all say these
words because we’re shaken and stunned to have been in the close proximity of
imminent and brooding death. Our
wonderment springs from our recent brush with mortality, from having walked in
the Valley of the Shadow of Death. We
sense that Death, the Grim – and the indiscriminating – Reaper, could just have
well have been eyeballing US.
As for the
soon-to-be dearly departed, we feel we ought to have been more respectful – to
have paid more attention. We should have given the person his due. If only we’d
known he was in the clutches of death…
Had we known, we surely
would have regarded the about-to-die in a new light. We would have marveled at the fact that death
had singled him out, distinguishing him and investing him with an aura of
sorts. We might have gazed upon the doomed with awe or curiosity, puzzling out to
ourselves what had made him special – what had earmarked him for death. Had he
done his work on earth? Was he needed elsewhere? Where was he bound?
Maybe we would have been
able to see absolutely nothing out of the ordinary about him, except that he
had the hand of death upon him. Nevertheless, we would have tried to seize upon
something to remember him by.
We would have stood
in thrall at implacable Death, or perhaps then again we might have been
appalled by its importunity – its bad manners.
And we would have
been amazed and chagrined that he who was about to die was all unawares – was
neither cowering in the shade of Death nor savoring what precious little time
was left to him.
Then there’s this: We think maybe we could
have done something, said something…
Yes, we do imagine, if
we could have spoken the right word, summoned the right phrase, we might even
have warded off Death.
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