If you're a mole, you'll be happy

Noah Webster, lexicographer and educator, died on this day in 1843.  His An American Dictionary of the English Language was one of the first dictionaries published, and survives today as the Merriam-Webster dictionary.

“Dead, adj.:

 Done with the work of breathing; done

 With all the world; the mad race run

Though to the end; the golden goal

 Attained and found to be a hole!” -- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary.

Sign on a convenience-store billboard: "You're freindly neighborhood market."
Maybe the self-marketers wish to cast a "spell" on passers-by.

Today's coined work: spellunkhead, n.: One who flaunts his poor spelling skills, rather than properly concealing them in a cave.